Anxiety has been needed for millions of years to protect us from danger. Since then, trouble has changed – it’s now complex societal processes that you can’t influence and can’t escape. And because of that, it’s easy to get caught in a loop of anxiety: you know something is wrong, but you can’t do anything about it and only get more anxious.
When we’re stuck in an anxiety loop, we can’t properly take care of ourselves and our loved ones, work properly, and do useful things. And you can’t get rid of anxiety completely – it’s an ancient mechanism. But it’s possible to do something so that it isn’t so strong and does not interfere with life too much.
Live It, Not Suppress It
All emotions are necessary because they serve a function. And all emotions have to be lived through, not suppressed. And, for example, there is no problem with living joy: if you feel joyful, you rejoice, embrace others, laugh, etc.
There are so-called bad emotions. They’re called bad emotions because it’s as if you’re ashamed to live and show them. And that only leads to anxiety building up.
Anxiety can and should be lived through, not hidden. For example, like this:
- Pay attention to the fact that you are in anxiety right now.
- Imagine that anxiety is a separate part of you, as if it were one part of your personality. Mentally address it: “Hello, anxiety. I see you. You’re anxious.”
- Imagine that this detached anxiety is a being who wants something. “What do you want, my anxiety? Do you want clarity in your current situation? Honey, no one has clarity right now.”
- Offer some understandable and feasible action to satisfy the anxiety. For example: “Let’s agree that I will study the news for a specific task. What do you and I want? To find out how safe the streets are. Let’s subscribe to the city’s publishers and read them every day.”
Anxiety, like any other emotion, needs to be “walked around” but also needs to be negotiated with rather than let it take over your life. Imagine that anxiety is your secretary of defense. He has been with you for many millions of years, he has a mission to protect you. Don’t pretend it doesn’t exist. Work with it.
Focus on Daily Tasks
The ancient alarm was needed to act instantly: hear a rustle, run away at once. Even if a person faced natural disasters that he could not overcome in any way, he still had to focus on himself: exactly where to go and what to do.
Now many problems are so complex and global that no momentary action will solve them. And this drives us even deeper into anxiety.
To make friends with anxiety, we have to shift our focus to what we can do today. It’s a difficult mental exercise in the big picture, but it’s what helps a person ground themselves:
- Careful fulfillment of one’s work responsibilities.
- Child care.
- Gambling at Woo Casino or trying a new sport.
- Cooking, cleaning, household chores and hygiene.
- Any other activities that create a sense of progress.
The opposite also works: a person restrained by anxiety tends to neglect his duties, take poor care of himself, begin to eat poorly, etc. Because of this, his or her well-being and everyday life sharply deteriorate, and the condition worsens. And during any difficult situations it is very important not to aggravate.
Plan of Action
In a situation of uncertainty, the brain tries to calculate all options for the development of events. On the one hand, it helps to prepare for a possible apocalypse, on the other hand, it can drive you into a stupor. The trap is that a man almost never thinks over every variant up to the end, he does not finish his alarming plots. At some point, he gets so scared that he discards the unsettling thought. But the anxiety persists.
There is such a mental exercise:
- Write down on different pages of a notebook options for bad outcomes of the current situation. For example, if there is an economic crisis in the country, the outcomes could be downsizing, resignation at will, bankruptcy, depreciation of money.
- For each scenario, write out specific actions you can take in advance; and what to do if that scenario materializes. This will result in a set of actions that need to be taken now and in the future.
- All that remains is to sort the scenarios by some factor: for example, how likely it is that it will happen; or which one is easier for you to prepare for now. And start taking action.
Here it’s essential to stop chewing “anxiety gum”: when the brain spins a scary movie, but does not finish spinning it to the end. You have to finish watching it, say “thank you” to anxiety, and get down to business.
There are things that are beyond our control – economic crises or pandemics. But there are things we control. You can go to school and develop new skills to increase your value as a professional. You can accumulate a safety cushion. If it comes to quitting your job, you have enough money to last while you look for a new job, and the extra skills will help you find one faster.